Board Thread:Creation Box/@comment-25693292-20150103233755/@comment-3058106-20150103234629

Okay, first off all, I feel like you need to just add a bit more to the personality. Mainly just a few more positive and negative traits just to balance everything out. Also, try not to list things such as love for music in personality because that's more of a trivia fact. Also, based on his personality, I feel like he's very one-dimensional and is mainly just seen as the nice guy. Try to add a bit more negative traits to make him more rounded and developed.

You also need to add some more to the history. It's very lacking in describing his background. Try to write about his childhood, old friends, growing up, how is family was when he was young, etc. Also write more about things he does like. This would be a great oppurtunity to talk about his passion for music and how he learned to play the guitar. What made him become interested in it? Has he ever thought about playing other instruments?

Just fix those few things up and it should all be good!